Friday, June 22, 2007

Why Pete & Jen can't be friends....Sometimes

Friday, June 22, 2007
Sometimes, I tend to agree with Pete, who believes that a man and a woman can't be friends because sex will get in the way of the friendship.

It doesn't necessarily have to be sex that will destroy it though. Sometimes, it could be betrayal. Betrayal of that faith that you can actually be just "friends" without the complications of more than what is there.

In high school, I had a best girl friend. I told her things that I would normally tell my guy-friends, like crushes. We'd hang out together whenever there's some time among us. People thought there was more to it, but of course they were wrong. She got herself a boyfriend and even after they broke up, our circle of friends remained.

Up to this day. I only have a few girl friends and they are getting fewer.

I don't mind being treated as one of the group, in fact, I enjoy it because it makes me feel that I have penetrated an exclusive club with its private jokes and secret language. I am past feeling uncomfortable whenever the girls make a green joke. I can eat lunch or dinner with them alone without worrying that it might be misconstrued as a date. I open up to them about personal stuff that I am more comfortable telling my girl-friends because sometimes, it's refreshing to get a girl's perspective on things. I don't mind exchanging backslaps with them or listening to them talk about husbands or boyfriends or even their infidelities. I don't judge women's faithfulness to their partners because that is their lives, although I feel for the guys involved with them and could only hope that I would be smarter not to find myself in a similarly sticky situation. Besides, with these confidences that they tell me, I know that guys need a girl's perspective at times too and I don't hesitate to tell them that I won't tolerate infidelity in my girl.

And I won't tolerate overtures too. I can take a joke, why not. And I know when something's a joke, when something needs to be taken seriously or with a grain of salt.

But I hate it when a girl acts like she can run away with overtures disguised as a joke or "friendly" banter when we both know it's not. I hate it when that friendship I offered is being used as an excuse to take advantage of me. It's different to listen to a guy's infidelity woes and to be its object. I guess some girls think that just because you are single or your girlfriend is not within threatening distance, you will reciprocate their false attention.

Sometimes I wonder if I am not making myself clear. Some people just can't take no for an answer to a question that's not even heartfelt at all. Or perhaps, some people just like torturing me with their tasteless overtures. And that, leadies and gentlemen, is why I don't believe a man and a woman can just be friends some of the time.

Some girls just don't get it.

1 comments:

Poonky

digesting digesting ur post~~~

hi just passing by~ added you to my blog roll

i kinda agree with u partially about this, but sometimes things can be the other way around too who knows rite?

 
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