Monday Jokes

The Time of our Life

*I used to have Saturday Night Fever...now I just have Saturday Night hot flashes.

*Any woman can have the body of a 21-year-old...as long as she buys him a few drinks first.

*My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

*Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

*I've still got it, but nobody wants to see it.

*I'm getting into swing dancing. Not on purpose...some parts of my body are just prone to swinging.

*It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker. It makes me think I've reached my sexpiration date.

*People our age can still enjoy an active, passionate sex life! Provided we get cable or that dish thing.

*The good news is that even as we get older, guys still look at our"boobs." The bad news is they have to squat down first.

*These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief."

*Don't think of it as getting hot flashes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches.

*Don't let aging get you down...It's too hard to get back up.

*Remember: You don't stop laughing because you grow old, You grow old because you stop laughing.